Sunday, October 31, 2010

Fave Rave

Having been never home in my younger years due to dance, song, and acting, I never was much of an audience. Yet there are  a few big and small screen appearances which are rarely missed by me when they are on. I am at this moment referring to "The Rocky Horror Picture Show", which after the tenth viewing, I stopped counting.

Friends took me to see it at a local arts theater first in 1980. I didn't know what to make of it or the annoying audience. They'd seen it before. A lot of times before. They thought they were part of it. The media made them part of it. But this once, I was overhwelmed into being a stunned audience.

When Tim Curry made his meteoric entrance, a rush went through me. It shook me. How could a man dressed in beads, make-up and female underwear hit me that way? He did. The remainder of his cast faded beside him. It was the pinnacle performance of his career. Sadly consigned to the "cult" list, it didn't hit big on release. But it has been enduring.

Last seen, Tim Curry was in the end of season episode of "Criminal Minds". I didn't get to see the second half, played in the fall of the past year. Tim Curry's around. He's been in a number of roles which all have managed to underutilize his talent. But then, there aren't many roles written which equal "Frank n Furter". So, finally, I am recording it to VCR, and am going to sit back and relax and enjoy the feeling of my younger years, the angelic music, and the "Time Warp" again.

Salut, Tim Curry, wherever you may be!

Pegi

I Never Talked About It....

It wasn't the shortest engagement on record, but 28 days if it was a month. I never said much because the reasons were so multiple, perhaps because of the schizophrenia he was beset with and the things connected therewith, or my ESP kicked in again. In any event, I ended it.

I had seen the man in the bar several times before, always too drunk to be spoken to. Two years later, he reappeared seeming all clean and sober and for some reason, maybe because I don't drink, velcro-izing onto me. At a point when I was ready to go home, he said "I'll walk you to your car." There he asked me if I'd consider going out with him. Hadn't expected that. Something in me said "If you say no, he is going to end up dead." How true that turned out to be. I said o.k, sure. He lived.

He lived because sometimes I can be a total _____. Not that I like it, but there are certain things I just can't let be. He was having some kind of problem, constantly falling asleep, complaining of stomach pain. On one of such days, I found his two sons, one 11 , the other approaching 4 years of age, clinging to each other trembling down in the computer room. I asked them what was wrong. They said "We think Daddy's on drugs again and we're afraid. He's going to die and we don't know what to do." I promised them it had me worried too, but for sure it wasn't drugs, it was something else and I'd make sure it was taken care of. I promised them.

I forced hin to go to the doctor. I hate it when people make me nag and get tough, I think they should be more mature and self-responsible than that. Just like I think they should get their own butts out of bed when it's time for them to go to work. Sense to go to the doctor and not give some gobblydygook excuse about the VA is going to whatever in six months. I finally got him to go to my doctor, whose husband is a cardiologist. She felt the stomach thing was something else, so right quick scheduled the jackass for another test next day.

A long test after a long drive, to be followed by a long night. The tests showed blockages in 3 coronary arteries. Emergency procedure was scheduled with first available for the next morning. The closest place was St. Michael's, in Newark, about 30 miles north, 5 AM the next morning. Though it was past winter, there was frost on my car. We did the trip. At the hospital, I had a long wait. It was only supposed to take a couple of hours, a 5 hour stay at max. There were complications.

It seems he was about to pop a couple of aneurisms the arteries to his heart. Stents had to be put in, there was a stability question. They didn't want to cause a rupture. They'd keep me informed. I called his parents. And waited some more. The nurses got me some food, I needed it right then. Around 7PM, they came and said he was asking for me. He was awake, a little out of it, but not bad. The doctors said it was too risky to let him go home. Go get some rest, come back tomorrow morning around 10 AM. I wasn't arguing. I was in awful pain from my spinal injuries. I can only be up for a while, then I need to lie down or I'll fall down. No fun. But I did what had to be done.

I never from the start thought about marrying him, he came up with that. But I'd answered that call that I'd heard when he asked me out. His family was thrilled, the kids were happy. They loved me and showed it. He couldn't stand that. He'd been the center of their attention for some time, since he'd gotten his psych-dis from the Marines and his ex-wife had died shortly after the birth of their second kid and end of marriage.
That's the reason it began. Why it ended, that will be another day's writing. But for now, I just was not going to live like that. Better for me in the long run to just walk.

til another day,
Pegi  

Friday, October 29, 2010

First Tuesday, November-Will chaos reign again?

Not everyone lives in New Jersey. Consider yourselves lucky. I don't know why people move here. To escape from New York, it seems. The situation is terrible. And maybe about ot get worse.

I am aware there are great differnces between the Medical Care Services one gets in NYC and what one does not get in NJ. Knowing best about NJ's lackings, I'll address, but not before I say something that's been needing to be said-last I knew, Rush Holt was not a rocket scientist. To the best of my knowledge, he was a nuclear physicist and a great humanist. But what would I know? I didn't work at PPPL all that long because of a shoulder which just wouldn't stay where it should. It was immobilizing and I couldn't do the drive. But the man know his stuff. He never sits still. He never stops.And he has a huge rank of Medicare/Medicaid constituents due to the numerous retirement villages in his district. He's my Congressman and I've been the happier for it. He is very responsive and Ihad the pleasure of walking a memeber of his staff thru the reality of "out here" a few years ago, courtesy of the "Walk a Mile...(in my Shoes)Program."

About medical care in NJ-you get it if you're lucky. If you're lucky, you can actually afford the outrageousness of the insurance companies who bleed you dry and then renege on their end of the contract (especially car insurance-it's mandatory here, and they screw you every which way even if, like me, you have never had a moving violation in your entire 42 year driving history. If you've been the victim of other drivers or as recently a tree falling on my car, you're screwed. They'll find a way not to pay. They expect everyone to just accept their phony damage estimate and don't argue with them. They put the doctors through the same crap.

My step brother is 5 years younger than me. They've had financial difficulties all along, but especially in this economy. They can't afford to go to the dentist, so he tries to work on his own rotting out teeth. Why? Because he was a trusting dummy who doesn't screw people over, so he expects the same. He nearly lost his house because of some scheister, he's barely able to keep his cars on the road (while "Detroit" rolls in "Goernment Gold"-since they priced themselves out of everyone's reach to begin with, they should have stayed there) and medical care? What's that?If they could afford the doctor, even though a lot of pharm co's have limited assistance for certain individuals, they can't bouy the medicine. So what's the point of any of it? And he doesn't understand that the system needs changing. He doesn't understand that being "American" is about changing what's wrong-that's what it was about from the day the Revolution grew from seed to germination. It's wrong to burden the people. Eventually, that took a war to extend to all the people, but slavery here is nowhere near dead. It just took on a more plasmatic form and hides at random in different houses. The current system of non-care in Medical field is a huge contributor to this. Why should a man lose his house just because he got sick once. Why should he have to take out a "Medical Savings Account" when he can't get his teeth fixed now?When his wife never gets over bronchitis because the house is always too hot in summer, too cold in winter and they can't afford medicine? Oh, they fell through the cracks. Yeah. That's a crack I'm sick of hearing. Stop with the cliches and get real like you maybe give a hoot because it maybe and probably will happen to you. Would have the thought the one good thing would have come out of the crashed econmomy. Maybe a few more people might actually care. But no. Once they get over their own rough stuff, it's now time to begrudge.

Medicaid doesn't pay docotors. I tried to find a Medicaid doctor for a friend via internet and can't even get a list of participating's from the state. She's a cancer survivior. She's not getting the right kind of care. The government has taken away funding because they figure the private sector is rolling in doantions dough. In a sense, they're correct, but the money isn't getting to the people to help them. It's going into administrative and "charity" perpetuating paychecks. To qualify as a charity, you can't show a profit. They find every way to hide it except to help the patients libe-really live. The only one that seems to vary from the norm are the AIDS charities, who realize there's more to medicine than hospital satys, such as eating and having a secure place to live, and maybe some rare addiction services program. Don't know for sure. But I do know that the only thing Medicaid wantsed to pay for was stays in nursing homes. So Senator Lautenberg authored the "Community Choice Act of 2009" so Medicaid could stop stuffing people into the 12x20 incacerations they get when they're old, sick and broke. Where did it go?

America, you have a bad habit of turning the lash on your own selves. When things get good, you decide it's time for a change. Due to your misconceptions, I haven't been to gynecologist in 9  years or had a mammogram in as many. And I was diagnosed with carcinoma in situ in both breasts just before that. But one clean biopsy, and the current Medicare (who, by the way, are actually NOT the government, but private insurance companies conctracted to the government) decides you are no longer in an "at risk" category. It used to take a few clean biopsies before you got pushed into that void. Private funding there has been disappearing too. There's a pre-process you have to go through to see what your financial standing is before you even get in the door for an appointment. And that's under the Susan B. Koman foundation's assistance. It always seems the poor can't get and the rich get everything for free here. Including medical care.

And no, the government does not take care of a person on Medicare. Depending on what you're willing to go without or have the ability to comprehend, you might get an HMO that includes most evrything, but then the dollar expenditure limits on other things will leave you bankrupt. Unless you're a Specified Low Income Medicare Beneficiary, you pay your Medicare premium straight out of Social Security, you pay your co-pays (20% or more), you pay for anything you need they decide they for some reason don't cover; you must accept the generic form of any medication if available (which I don't fully disagree with), you stiil sometimes have an enormous co-pay. This donut-hole they've been talking about, that's  a $2,000. copay all-at-once on your medicine. (And now they give you $250. back if you go through that).

Do you get the picture? I hope so, because I live in it, and frankly, I don't want to look. It's coming onto Halloween Eve and I know I'd rather watch a horror movie which has less chance of happening than the horror that this mess is. And yes, the greedy get greedier. They won't even wait for Medicare to process before they start demanding to be paid. If you do that, you wait 3 months after they get the Medicare money to get paid back. Floating themsleves a loan on the those who are vicitms to be begin with-something attacked them-a germ, a virus, a car, a fall,--. And I know a system that was much better, where everyone had care and no one went without it. But I'm German and I know better than to say that America has the greatest medical care system in the world. You don't. Not even from the Capitalist Enterprise point of view that it is. If your docotr cures you, you're not repepat business. So where does that leave his business? It shouldn't be that your health and their monetary needs compete. I'm German, so I question everything-we don't want another Hitler, do we? Not most of us anyway. But then there are those days when the greedy little liars and crooks get away with what they get away with and no one can do anything about it and you begine to understand what was up with Josef Stalin-and you know you'ver been among them far too long.

When I was young, I never thought I'd have the ability to hate. But congratulations people. You've succeeded in teaching me that I most certainly can.
(P.S. I flunked typing. I know how to spell.)

Happy Hauntings! 

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Not Another "New & Improved"

Do you remember the t.v. commercial for the "new and improved" whatever-it-whats-its"? Like laundry detergent, cold medicine, fabrics? Somehow or another, they never worked as well as the old ones? The same thing is happening with our computers.

There's way too much "upgrade and update" going on and it's causing quite a mess on this supposed information superhighway. It's not what I was going to write about today, but after going thru all this, I'm sure I don't recall what I did want to say. It  wasn't about computers, or even the upcoming elections. I think it was going to be about jewelry. What do computers and jewelry have in common?

If the mode of transport to the store is your computer, beware. It has a nasty habit of not completely finishing your payment processing. So your order is stuck in limbo and you have no way to get it out. Try using the customer service system on ebay. Good luck. After a week or so, you might get to talk to someone. The individual merchants are much faster in replying and I can get something here from China faster than I can get it released from jtv. For what reason? JTV says credit card orders take ten days to two weeks to process. I knew something was wrong there, because in between I've ordered and received my merchandise from Hong Kong.

There's a nasty litttle pop-up from bizrate or whatever that keeps popping into my checkout sequence. If it happens to you,  ignore it. They're trying to get your financial information under the guise "This order qualifies you for a $100. reward". Right. After they have you take a survey they claim is for JTV, they tru to sell ("give")you magazines for a $2.00 processing fee. A whole six bucks is what you'll pay, but the trick is that they now want you to give them your financial information so you can get your "free gift."  Are any of us still that stupid? I hope not.

Internet Explorer has a nasty habit of aborting the entire checkout process when it says "Internet Explorer has blocked this website from displaying all content due to security certificate errors. Click here for options..." You click there and the page disappears. We need some heavy duty cyber-cops on Internet Explorer as well as any high volume sites which may be subjected to raiders. If the crooks spent as much brainpower improving the world as they do on defrauding it, things might change for the better. They might even find their minds occupied by something better than giving everybody else "the screw".

I can't believe I actually had to say to a supplier that if the goods were picked over when they got here, they're going back. No, I don't trust the warehouse & shipping crews. I've been out in the world too long to think they can be trusted. Especially when recently I got into a conversation with two ladies in the local Wal-Mart who told me I wouldn't believe if they said.

What they said was that the security people in a certain store were "setting up" employees to get busted by planting things in their pocket books and going thru their lockers(now there's a corrupted crime scene and should be thrown out of court)and diverting attention in that way from what was really going on. What was really going on was the security and warehouse people were once again doing as others I know of without a doubt have done:diverting (stealing)entire truck trailers full of merchandise to their own special depots. It was 1973 when I heard of the first incident. It is now 2010.

Perhaps some things never change in this world, but for sure, it's much easier now than ever to lose the paperwork in the cyberjungle. Truckloads of merchandise, medical records, financial records and IRS data. I've been around those blocks for my Dad an awful lot these past three years. He at least is fairly stable now whereas I am a fottstep away from being stuck in bed for a week. And an unnavigatable communications system doesn't help. My spine does not have an unbroken part in it. There isn't a day that I'm not in pain. And now  computer programmers have deemed themselves "engineers". But what are they building other than something that would give Rube Goldberg nightmares? Not buildings or bridges r tunnels that people actually use. And if you live in New Jersey, please back Sen. Lautenberg in demanding the tunnell project and the elction results be gone over manually with a fine toothed comb.

Well, maybe one day it will all just cancel each other out and we can return to the world as we knew it: out, talking to other people, making deals face to face. But then, how would I be able to get things from China? Or track things from the moment they're shipped til they're in the mail carrier's truck? Some things were done right. Don't "new and imrpove" what doesn't need changing.